Update for 7/12 Chemo #4 today /BRCA test results/church last Sunday

Well, I've tried a new anti-nausea medication on this round of adriamycin/cytoxin. It's called emend and I also have to take decadron with it. These two are in addition to the Aloxyi that they put in my IV before they pumped in the chemo. So far, it seems to be working pretty well, so I'm glad about that. Each one of these drugs works on a different brain receptor so it's like using the full army of anti-nausea drugs on my body. I was hesitant to do it for fear of dealing with other side effects that might be unkown. At this point, I'm soooo glad that I did it and I have Tim Tyler to thank hugely for the suggestion that I do it. The result is, it's now about three hours after the infusion and I don't feel that bad. I wouldn't say that I'm totally operational, but at least this time I don't feel like my head weighs 30 pounds and I can actually just veg in front of the tv for a bit. I'm so glad! I even ate some pizza for dinner. I'll continue to take it for the next three days with hopefully the same or better results!

In other news...the BRCA mutation testing that I had done showed that is was NEGATIVE- YES!!! Thank you all so much for praying. What's funny is that I sort of just knew it would be. You know how you just know things in your "knower?" Well, sometimes that just happens with me, so I attribute that to God who searches all things. So, let me explain this breifly for those of you that aren't acquainted with what it is and what the result indicates. BRCA stands for breast cancer mutation. There are two genes that have been isolated and found to be highly correlated with the incidence of breast cancer. Furthermore, the mutation is noticeably more present in those with Ashkenazi Jewish background (1 in 40). Since my genetic pedigree if you will is 75% Ashkenazi Jew, and having an incidence of breast cancer so young, I wanted to do it in order to see if I would need to remove both breasts and also have my ovaries and uterus removed (high correlation between breast and ovarian cancer that is also heightened by being BRCA positive). So, the fact that I do not have the mutation means less risk for my family members and surgery-wise for me, means that I'll probably have only a lumpectomy. The surgical choices are still a little up in the air only because I need to have an additional consult and see if it's possible since the tumor site is more or less adjacent to the site of DCIS (slightly different cancer that will not be affected by the chemo) in the breast. The big question is can the chemo shrink the tumor to the point where the surgeon can just do a lumpectomy, or relative to the size of my breast do they have to do a mastectomy. So, that will be the next variable to determine at this point. I'll have to provide more info about this when I talk to both the surgeon and a radiation oncologist. It is possible that, even if I elected to do a mastectomy or double mastectomy I would still need radiation due to the aggressive nature of the cancer, but I'll wait to see what s/he says. Of course, it would be great if surgery wasn't necessary, even for the lymph node dissection. Eric is believing that I won't need surgery. I hope so, and that would be truly amazing.

My mom (Marti) is here for a week so that's great to have her help, especially while I'm sitting in the chair for the poking and infusion. It really helps to have a distraction during that time where they're pushing red stuff into your veins (sorry to be so graphic, but that's the way it is) or have a hand to squeeze while they're inserting the needle into your hand. Ouch. I really really don't like that part. So.....I'm thinking seriously about having a "port" put in so that it's much easier to draw blood and infuse drugs without poking me every time for blood draws. Since I'll have to take herceptin every three weeks for a year (virtually no side effects from that) and I'll begin that with my next chemo. I was talking with the nurses and it just seems like that's a good idea-especailly since I really don't like the needle insertion process. It is a big needle and it really hurts. It's not like your regular blood draw kind of thing. Okay, maybe I'm a wimp but thinking about being stuck for infusions alone at least 17 times in the next year seems compelling enough to do that. Basically the port is a line into a vein that they surgically plant sub-cutaneously (under the skin) that provides easy access to your blood supply. I'd have to go in for a small surgical procedure, but I think with drugs that would be fine. At this point, being poked is not something I want to be doing that many times. It may have a little bump under the skin, but I'm fine with that-especially if it avoids the ouch factor. So, I'll probably go to see Dr. Shulz (Peter) since he was the one I saw initially for a surgical consult before I even had all of the data in, so he has some familiarity with the case and he is also at Eisnhower. I also like that he takes out the stitches himself, very proprietary. I like that in a surgeon. Anyway, having only wisdom tooth surgery in the past, I'm not too excited about it but if it avoids the "pick a winner" vein approach, I'm up for it!

In other news...Some of you might not have known this but I had a lock box in my flower bed so that friends could come and go and I wouldn't have to get up to get the door if I couldn't on my bad chemo days, etc., but for some reason pooof! It disappeared....after a little freakishness about this in my head, Debbie suggested she just come over and spend the night and we asked IPD to drive by as well. So she did, and they did and the next day, I got the locks changed, so I'm good now :-). Weird. I just thank God for his protection and for great friends.

This past weekend I loved being able to sing and play with my band, Surrender, at Video Cafe and even Siren. Scotty joined us, too for VC. I wasn't sure how I would do with singing Saturday night, and then serving in worship sunday morning and evening but God sustained me and gave me such great joy and inspiration becuase people were sharing how it was inspiring them. Wow the joy of the Lord truly is our strength! Plus, it's a way that I can still give back during this time and it feels good to give like that and just sense the Holy spirit working in it. It was great to be together and serve. I also was grateful for the opportunity to sing Joy Williams' "The Love of the Lord Endures" (from her "By surprise" CD-great song) at the end of the service although I missed my cue for the 11 oclock service at the end and accidentally kept Rick waiting...he was gracious :-). It was really a privilege. It always is a privilege and at the same time a weighty responsibility to serve others in worship becuase you want a help and not a hindrance. I love those times where you sense that everyone in the santuary is one team togeher and there is that sense of all of us together instead of some of us on the stage and some in the congregation because that's what it truly is-all of us together pressing on towards the prize :-)
Sunday night at Siren I wore a scarf on my head rather than my wig and it was fun becuase James DiBari also wore a do-rag. He also happens to be a cancer survivor and continues to percuss despite a shoulder that plagues him. The funny part was that we could have been called the three bald guys and two mexicans...I love those guys!

Hope this finds you well! Bless you all!
Julie